Home » Psychology: 7 red flags your relationship is mentally draining you: spot them now!

Psychology: 7 red flags your relationship is mentally draining you: spot them now!

As we journey through this inevitable but delightful maze called ‘life’, we form relationships. Wonderful, aren’t they? But sometimes, unbeknownst to us, these relationships begin to drain us mentally. Ever felt that?

It starts subtly, almost imperceptibly. One could be blissfully unaware of the silent havoc being wreaked on their mental landscape by a relationship they hold dear. The truth is, a mentally draining relationship isn’t always openly abusive or visibly toxic. Oh no, my dear reader, it often masquerades as an everyday partnership filled with regular disagreements.

Consider this: Have you ever found yourself feeling constantly tired, irritable, worn out and yet unable to pinpoint why? It’s like you’re carrying an invisible burden. Do you feel emotionally exhausted but can’t figure out the root cause? That’s what a mentally draining relationship can feel like.

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Let’s hear from someone who has been in such a situation. “I didn’t realize it at first”, says our anonymous friend. “It was just a constant feeling of being emotionally drained. Disinterested in things I once loved, and I just couldn’t understand why”.

“I mean, there were disagreements, of course. But isn’t that normal in any relationship? It’s only when I stepped back that I realized how all these little things had turned into a big thing impacting my mental health.”

Unfortunately, it’s an all too common experience. Many of us unwittingly fall into the trap of a mentally draining relationship without realizing its toll on our mental health. But don’t fret! There are signs and red flags that can suggest if a relationship is sucking the life out of you! Let’s look at those next…


Psychology: 7 red flags your relationship is mentally draining you: spot them now!
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1. Constant feeling of being emotionally drained

Do you often feel like you’re running on empty, with no energy left for your own interests or hobbies? This could be a red flag. A healthy relationship should energize you, not leave you feeling drained and exhausted.

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2. Negative impact on self-esteem

Take note if you’re feeling constantly belittled or criticized. Our relationships should make us feel good about ourselves, not undermine our self-worth. If your relationship is often making you feel low or unimportant, it’s a sign it’s unhealthy.

3. Constant need for approval

Are you always seeking their approval or validation? Do their words weigh heavily on your decisions? This could be a warning sign. A relationship should not create dependency, it should foster independence.

4. Persistent anxiety

Do you often feel anxious or stressed about your interactions with this person? It’s normal to feel anxious occasionally, but it shouldn’t be a persistent feeling. If it is, then that’s a red flag.

5. Feeling unheard or neglected

If your needs and feelings are frequently ignored or dismissed, that’s a clear sign! Your relationship should offer mutual respect and understanding.

6. Manipulation or control

Notice any signs of manipulation or control? That’s not a good sign. Your relationship should be based on equality and respect, not control.

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7. Lack of trust

Finally, is there a lack of trust in your relationship? Trust is the bedrock of any healthy relationship. A lack of it can indicate that the relationship is detrimental to your mental health.

In wrapping up, these check-points are not exhaustive, but they certainly provide a starting point for self-introspection. Remember, the main goal isn’t to provide a diagnosis or treatment strategies, but to encourage a mindful approach towards our relationships. If, after reading this, you find yourself nodding your head more often than not – it may be time to do some serious thinking.


It’s important to note that this article is for informational purposes only. It isn’t a substitute for professional advice. If you believe you’re in a mentally draining relationship and it’s impacting your wellbeing, please seek professional help. Your mental health always comes first!

Katrina E. Shuman
Written by, Katrina E. Shuman
With an unquenchable thirst for unraveling the secrets of the cosmos, Katrina is the guiding star behind our astrology, numerology, and horoscope sections. Her fascination with the celestial realms is intricately woven into every word she crafts, allowing her to seamlessly bridge the gap between cosmic wisdom and everyday life.